Lessons from the Grief of Job (Part 2) - What She Said Part 14 - Week 5 Day 6

TODAY'S TREASURE

Job's three friends heard of all this evil that was come upon him... they came to mourn with him and to comfort him.

Job 2:11 KJV

Transcript

Lessons from the Grief of Job (Part 2)

Colette Fabry, Guest Writer

Today’s Treasure

Job's three friends heard of all this evil that was come upon him…they came to mourn with him and to comfort him.

Job 2:11 KJV

Job’s grief is possibly the most devastating in the Bible. His story is heart-wrenching—a man who lost everything. While material possessions can be replaced, Job endured the unimaginable: the death of all his children—a burden heavier than most can bear.

His three close friends came with the intent to comfort him. But when they approached, they barely recognized him. Grief had left him unrecognizable, and illness had ravaged his body, covering him in painful boils. It’s hard to fathom such suffering.

In anguish, his friends wept aloud, tore their clothing in sorrow, and then sat with him. For seven days and nights, they remained silent, witnessing the depth of his grief without saying a word. Their presence alone conveyed shared sorrow. Had they remained silent, it might have been enough.

However, everything changed when they spoke. Instead of offering comfort, they compounded Job’s suffering. They suggested that Job must have sinned, implying that his suffering was God’s punishment. Their words, though well-intended, misrepresented God’s character and added to Job’s anguish. Rather than helping him process his grief, they turned his pain into deeper confusion.

Job found himself on the defensive, explaining his actions in the face of their accusations. But each time he spoke, they dissected his words, insisting he was wrong. When he recalled his faithfulness to God, they questioned his motives, calling him prideful. Instead of lifting his spirit, they became a weight upon him, making his suffering even more unbearable.

Despite their initial desire to support him, his friends’ words became weapons against his already wounded heart. Their words spiraled Job into confusion, challenging his understanding of God. Instead of offering comfort, they cast judgment, leaving him feeling alone and despondent.

Job’s heartbreak was not just from his losses but also from the misguided counsel of those who should have uplifted him. His heart grew heavier. He pleaded with them to stop speaking because he couldn’t bear their words. He told them that if their roles were reversed, he wouldn’t have criticized them; instead, he would have offered support:

"I would use my mouth to strengthen you and to help your grief." Job 16:5

His friends did not relent. Their arguments drained him, making him feel unheard and alone. One friend even asked, “How long will you keep talking?” Job replied, “How long will you vex my soul and break me in pieces with words?” He longed for comfort but received angry disputes instead. His frustration led him to call them “miserable counselors.”

Like many who grieve, Job was searching for a balm to soothe his pain. In his confusion, why didn’t his friends help him think clearly? In his longing to be heard, why didn’t they listen? When he begged for pity, why didn’t they show kindness? In his weakness, why didn’t they strengthen his faith? If he was desperate for God, why didn’t they pray for him?

Instead of offering what he truly needed—compassion, kindness, and hope—they assumed knowledge of God’s plans and misjudged his suffering. They failed to see the heartbroken man in front of them.

When God finally spoke, He condemned Job’s friends for their falsehoods. And in an ironic turn, it was Job who prayed for them—when all along, they should have been interceding for him.

LIFE-GIVING ENCOURAGEMENT

If we are given the privilege of entering the sacred space of someone’s grief, we must bring genuine comfort, often through silent presence. I recall sitting with a friend mourning the loss of her baby. She wept and asked, “Why?” The only honest answer I had was, “I don’t know.” I simply held her and offered a cup of hot tea. Though she never drank it, she remembers that small act of care years later.

Healing often comes through simple gestures—leaving a favorite coffee on a doorstep, delivering groceries, sending a thoughtful message, or helping with household tasks. These actions remind the grieving that they are seen, heard, and not alone. At the right time, we can gently remind them of God the Healer, who sees and hears.

As a grief counselor, I have learned to wait patiently, allowing the bereaved to lead the conversation. I wish Job’s friends had done the same. God is near to the brokenhearted and fiercely loves them. Serving those in pain is a sacred calling—one that aligns with His heart.

PRAYER

Father, be near to those who are grieving and feeling alone. Send them true comfort and encouragement through friends who truly see and hear them. Surround them with people who will point them back to You.